Actual email ...

... received by a colleague from a fellow employee (emphasis added)

"I open this acct. and when I opened it I saw his card. (due to the size of the check. it was lottery processeds.) I called and lefted a message yesterday for you to
call me.can you please call me at 301-933-6311. I dont wont to have to call him back for that If I dont have to he also has met with the investment team as well.
please give me a call if you dont mine."

Jesus Christ .... SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!!!!!! Grammar, spelling, punctuation .... or lack thereof

I can't make this shit up